Your village must really be missing their idiot.You’re so ugly… when you were born they had to get a Cleric to cast Resurrection after your mother saw your face.Are you trying to defeat me with your weapon, or your odor?.I’ve met cantaloupes with better fighting moves than you.Your eyes are open, mouth moving, but Mr Brain has long since departed eh?. ![]() Think the Clerics can grow you some balls, coward.The only thing you could look good in is a body bag!.I have no idea what manner of cursed beast your mother screwed under a full moon to make you… but I think she owes us all an apology.I’ve never met anyone that would look better for an Acid Splash to the face!.Wow, you’re really bad at this! Why don’t you try picking on someone smaller than you, see if that helps?.Aw, do you need a time out? Too bad this isn’t nursery school, whelp!.Don’t worry, if mind flayers ever descend you’ll be safe.I’d spit on you, but you’re so filthy no one would be able to tell the difference.I’m not sure whether I should use Charm Person or Hold Monster….Got a Wand of Enfeeblement stuck up your behind? Because you really suck at this.Looking for a quick fix? Roll a d20 and find a random jibe: Best Insults for Bards Randomly Rolled Insults , Dungeons & Dragons Players Handbook 5th edition. This spell’s damage increases by 1d4 when you reach 5th level (2d4), 11th level (3d4), and 17th level (4d4). ![]() If the target can hear you (though it need not understand you), it must succeed on a Wisdom saving throw or take 1d4 psychic damage and have disadvantage on the next attack roll it makes before the end of its next turn. You unleash a strong of insults laced with subtle echantments at a creature you can see within range. Really want to double down on your slander-slinging capabilities? Consider taking the Vicious Mockery cantrip, too!
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